I am a Loser.

Apparently, I am a loser. At least that is according to the so called experts. I've heard from these experts my entire life.

These are the experts who said that my being raised by a single mother was problematic at best. 

These are the experts who felt that a woman raising a boy was just as problematic. 

These are the experts who felt that sending me to an educational program during the summer would make me a nerd. And we know what happens to nerds at school. 

These are the experts who said that my attending an all boys school that has produced such alumni as Disney's former CEO Michael Eisner, Academy Award Winner Michael Douglas, Emmy Winner Richard Thomas, Jaws author Peter Benchley, The Weitz Brothers, Writer/Producer Zak Penn, journalist Benjy Sarlin, and acclaimed director Sean Durkin among others would scar me for life.

These are the experts who questioned my attending a boarding school.

These are the experts who thought that I had wasted my education by becoming a teacher.

These are the experts who thought that teaching in independent schools was also a waste because I should be helping public school children and not the children of color who attend independent school.

These experts also questioned my marrying a white woman as a black man.

Now, experts are claiming that I am not a man because I chose to be an at home father. You see these experts claim that there is only one definition of masculinity, and that is being the primary breadwinner for a family. Anything else is part of the emasculation of America.

I have dealt with being narrowly defined all my life, as I have also been told by some of those experts that I was not black enough due to my desire to be educated and speak a certain way. Little did they know the sheer amount of time I have spent aiding the development of black youth in almost two decades in education. 

So, if I am a loser to these misguided, shortsighted individuals who embrace stereotypes, then fine. I am a loser. The biggest, most satisfied loser I know. This loser is loved. This loser is happy. 

And to those experts . . . I have spent my entire life proving you wrong. Why should I stop now?

Posted on June 6, 2014 .